


Healing touch

by Matthew1972



Series: Celestial affairs [3]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: Anal Fingering, Anal Sex, Bottom Sam Winchester, Caring Castiel (Supernatural), Dirty Talk, First Time, Fluff and Angst, Friends to Lovers, Healing Sex, M/M, Massage, POV Sam Winchester, Porn with Feelings
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-05-22
Updated: 2019-05-22
Packaged: 2020-03-09 18:10:25
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,691
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18922354
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Matthew1972/pseuds/Matthew1972
Summary: During a private night for two in his bedroom Castiel offers to take care of Sam, to heal him in a more joyful way than 'merely with his grace'. All Sam is asked to do is trust in him… in their love. How can he not when all he's ever longed for is to be seduced by 'his' angel? His doubts fall away under skilled hands and the sinful tongue of purely intimate pleasures.





	Healing touch

"Strip for me."

The soft, rumbled request pauses Sam where he stands, book still in hand. Lost by the unexpected change away from their gone past midnight session of research, he blinks at the suited angel sitting on his bed. Since recent days Castiel isn't shy to be in here, not alone and not with Sam around. His trench coat, and with it his ethereal aura, hangs from the hook bolted on the inside of his bedroom door. Castiel is leaning back against his pillows, with his arms folded and his fingers entwined on his belly. He looks relaxed and comfortable. Like he belongs. Sam can't shake the flutter of emotions at the sight of him, of how this isn't the first night they're sharing his bedroom… or his bed…

Kisses though are one thing, as are cuddles, and whispered conversations into the night. Sam often feels comforted too by the low turned sounds and bright colours emanating from the television as he falls asleep next to Castiel. But this? The blunt question is as new to him as the soft smile of longing. What does it even mean?

Sam wonders if he's heard it right. It's not that he hasn't changed outfits yet. The sweatpants and his favourite grey sleeping shirt wrapped around his body are what he's worn every night before and since he's invited Castiel inside to watch Netflix. Unsure of anything beyond the rising flutter of emotions he's tried to keep within for a good while now Sam manages to ask, "What?"

"You're exhausted…" When Sam is too slow to wave the blunt observation off in his usual automatic response Castiel presses on. "Tense. Human. You need sleep and I can help. We can continue our research tomorrow, yes?"

His quiet spoken honesty is nothing new to Sam, but in his tired mind he can't connect it to the original question. In any other previous case of perceived hurt all Castiel has had to do is rest two fingers against his forehead. One touch of grace usually works miracles. "Sure… but I…"

Sam trails off on his answer when Castiel slips from his bed, as if sensing the inability of his brain to hear between the lines. In his silent pause he watches his friend close the distance between them. Personal space shatters at the warm hold of a hand around his shoulder. "Sam", Castiel almost sees into him through his confused gaze. "Let me care for you? I've been human too, not for long, but still… I can recognize the pain for what it is. There's no need to feel shy about your needs, not with me."

"My needs or yours?" Sam catches onto the glint of something close to arousal, of want… or does he? He can't be sure, but on a whim of his sleepy mind the question he has blurts out of him before he can censor himself like he usually does.

Grinning Castiel leans closer to him. "How about ours?"

"You… what?"

Even as he berates himself for his continued inelegant use of his native language Sam feels how Castiel worms free the book from his hands. Belatedly letting go of it, he waits for Castiel to rest it aside on the nearest shelf. Intent pours deeper into his soul when at last the angel admits to his truth. "I want you, Sam. For me to be here, with everything of you around me, it's… well, I can't ignore what I am feeling for you. When you are hurt, so am I."

Sam offers him a wry smile to avoid voicing admission and yet not quite. As much as he feels unworthy of affection, he can't resist the temptation aimed for him in all its glory. Can't fight his called-out emotions any more than Castiel seems to. "You could just use your grace, you know."

What little distance is left between them shatters when in answer Castiel presses a soft kiss of heat on his lips. Fingers entwine with his while he whispers in Sam's ear. "I could, but then, where is the joy in that?" Upon his gasp of pure pleasure Castiel licks his lower lip, teasingly and promising. By far too soon he leans away from him. "Sam, I know of a more pleasant way to undo the tension and heal you. If you'll let me, I can show you. Do you think you can trust me enough to let go?"

With his throat gone dry Sam nods. Faced with the full force of seductive charm and far too honest care he's lost, and yet he knows in his heart that he is right where he wants to be. Held close and safe. "Always."

"Then let me ask again. Will you undress for me, please?"

"Yes."

* * *

A little shy still Sam stretches out belly down on his bed. It's not that he's ashamed of his nudity, but his bared skin wears too many reminders of his failures. The pain behind the scars he knows too well. Scars which he can map out with his eyes closed or in the dark. Each one represents a story of a hunt gone wrong. From the faint werewolf claw marks on his left hip to the jagged lines of skin drawn back over wounds which he's had to stitch up himself. Other scars remind him of times when he could not protect Dean or Castiel from going down too, near deaths he can still feel the bitter grief of. Almost worse though, and far more private, are the scars on his soul, the ones carved into him in hell and healed only in the physical sense of the word. On most nights Sam can't close his eyes to their invisible presence. No one sees them… because he won't let them.

Like so often these days Castiel senses his unease. It's all in how he brushes a gentle hand upwards over his spine. Sam shivers under its pleasant warmth, breathing out his nervous tension by sheer will alone. "I have locked the door", Castiel says. His voice has gone almost as soft as the caress he now extends down his left arm until he can entwine warm fingers with Sam's cooler ones. "No one can enter your room, but know that you can leave it at any time. I won't hurt you though."

"I know. It's not that…", Sam falters. The unease slips a little from his mind under the brush of soft lips pressing kisses behind his ear. He tries to find words to how he feels damaged and tainted. How it's been a while since he's dared to love someone else this much, someone other than his brother that is, because of the cold truth that he's lost everyone once close to him. "Cas, I can't lose you too…", he manages on a rush of words and a blush of emotions.

"Nor I you." The sure reply comes with a trail of kisses over his spine… each one pressed onto his skin a little lower than the one before it. One by one they become more sensual in promise and pleasure to Sam. It's all but impossible not to melt into the sweet kisses. His mind be damned he wants Castiel in heart and soul. Can't quite remember a day when he hasn't longed for what he thought he could never have. Castiel is fully focussed on him though, tempting him with a continued path of kisses and soft touches up and down his spine. "Forget your past for a while, Sam. We are in here together, without interruptions. This, us, is what matters most. At least for tonight."

"How can I?"

"Like this."

His breath hitches in anticipation. Sure hands wrap around the back of his knees, asking of him to open his legs. Sam allows it, can't help his gasp of longing… of lust, brought on firmer by the way Castiel kneels between his now spread legs. The silent pause between kisses takes almost too long, but then he hears Castiel take off his suit jacket and he understands. While it falls through the line of his sight to get recklessly dismissed to the floor next to his bed the pause stretches for a few seconds longer.

Before Sam can think of what it means warm, and now massage oil slick too, hands slide up over his back to press into the muscles of his still tense shoulders. He gasps at how they seek out the weeks old strain built up firm inside of him with deadly precision. Thumbs dig into painful knots… untangling them with skilful strokes of tender care. "Cas…" Sam voices his pleasure with a sigh, helpless to deny himself what feels so right that he can't fight the moment of pure intimacy dished out on him. Maybe, insecurities be damned, he does deserve something good?

* * *

Under each kneaded touch of the pleasure, which Castiel wrings from his body, Sam drifts off further from his troubled self-doubts. It's been too long ago since someone touched him without the desire to hurt or kill. The idea seems almost absurd to him, but with each next caress he can't ignore the truth of what is happening in the safety of the bubble they've created. That Castiel touches on more than his muscles. How with each massaging stroke he melts down the inner barriers Sam has hidden his soul behind for far too long.

"That's it…" Castiel slides his oil slick hands further down his spine and back up again. "Stop fighting yourself. You are only human. It is all right to let go." Merciless he keeps up the long strokes to untangle more knots.

The part of Sam which is always in tune with the need to run and survive huffs at being called out. He curls his fingers into the sheets, unsure whether to listen to his instinct to hide or to hear out his body's determination to yield in pleasure. As if Castiel senses his indecision the fingers curl out further… more teasing than massaging his lower spine. Sam gasps when on each alternate stroke warm, fleeting brushes of thumbs over the rise of his ass cheeks add onto the flutter of arousal which wakens slowly from within him.

"I've got you." Warm lips pause from talking to press a kiss onto his left hip. "You are safe."

"I know…"

"Then believe it."

"I…" Sam can't not trail off under the knowing stare he meets when he braves a glance up at Castiel.

"In your heart, Sam. Not just with that brilliant mind of yours." Undeterred Castiel slides down his hands firmer over each swell of his ass and further down to his thighs. "Quit being so damned hard on yourself, being a stubborn Winchester. You are worth so much more than you think, a part of what keeps me here."

"Cas… you can't give up heaven for me." Sam shakes his head, not quite in denial, but more in his disbelief. "Not for the boy with demon blood."

"Why not? I'm free to be with the person I want, and you are _my_ choice." Castiel corrects him without missing a beat. To emphasise his point, he bends down to add kisses onto and in between his sensually slow massaging strokes. "What I was told before. The way heaven once saw you… they were all so wrong. Your courage and your capacity to love are so much stronger than any dark force. I have seen what you have overcome since we met. The struggles. The pain. You didn't just survive, Sam. You've become a leader among hunters. Your body may be scarred, but your soul burns even brighter than it once did. For all my thousands of years… yours speaks to me unlike any other."

Unable to help himself Sam tenses. He can't grasp how after all of his wrongs Castiel, an Angel of the Lord, speaks about him with such sincere awe. The praise is too much. His instinct to fight tries to dig in its heals, but Sam doesn't want it to. In between the lines he hears the love. Knows how it taints the way Castiel must see him… because in turn he suffers from the same affliction. The flutter in his stomach, the way his cock continues to harden further under skilled hands and the firm clasp Castiel has around his heart all keep him from running. "I'm not…"

"Perfect? Neither am I. No one ever is, I know that now. Sam, I will always protect you and watch over you, care for you, _if_ you'll have me." Hands wrap around the swells of each one of his ass cheeks, not to claim, but to add onto his intentions in a wordless question of consent.

The sheer force put behind the 'if' reminds Sam of how Castiel too isn't without doubts and self-blame. Over the years he has more than once witnessed the outfall of how celestial beings too make mistakes. He's even felt the slow growing amount of humanity in his friend bleed through. Seen how the choices Castiel has made out of the stubborn goodness in his core turned against him… against Earth even… and how they affected and changed him. But here, now, in the privacy of his bedroom, Castiel finds the courage to put his heart in his hands. Tonight is not about fear or loss. What he's asking of Sam is trust and love.

"Always", Sam sighs. He reaches out behind his body to spread out a hand on top of the one resting on his left buttock. "Don't stop. I need you. Make love to me, please?"

* * *

"Yes."

The answer doesn't even rise above a whisper of want. Castiel, it seems, is done talking with his voice. Instead he uses his slick fingers to speak for him in their skilful elegance of touch. Effortless they seek out the crack of his ass, to tease the edge of his until now hidden opening. Each caress though is but a mere flutter of fleeting sensations… and Sam can't help but want more. A plea rests on his tongue, but before he can push it out something warm and wet presses up against his rim.

"Cas!" His gasp born from surprise breaks off into one of pleasure.

Breath ghosts over the skin between his ass cheeks. Sam can feel it's unexpected cool before Castiel presses his hot tongue inside of him. Even as he wonders if angels need to breathe like humans do his mind can't finish the random thought. Everything he is narrows in to the sweet and more than intimate caress into his body. Nerve endings he's barely aware of ignite into a world of sensation. His anticipation fast races towards and beyond arousal. Sam can feel his cock stir up in the small space between his abdomen and the sheets of his bed, begging for touch while he arches up his ass. He's not sure where he needs friction the most.

Deeper the tongue burrows into him. The wet sounds Castiel is making as he eats him out add onto the pleasure he feels. Sam can feel himself open for more. Each lick against his walls borders on something between too much and not enough. Whimpers and broken of pleas fall from his throat, uncensored under the onslaught of pleasure he's never felt before. "Please… Cas… don't stop… it feels so good."

Undeterred Castiel slides his tongue in and out of his hole, fucking him open. Soft moans all but vanish between his ass cheeks and some even inside of him, along with each curl of wet heat. Sam blushes both with want and the sinful image he knows the two of them must make; his angel kneeling between his legs while he shamelessly pulls his knees underneath his abdomen so that Castiel can shatter apart even more of him.

"Yes… that's it. Let go…" Castiel slips a finger inside of him, adding to the heat of stretching him open with deep, sensual licks. "Give in to pleasure. Come apart on my tongue… my hunter, so handsome." Each filthy word comes out as a lust-filled rumble of a sound. Castiel sounds about as wrecked as Sam is beginning to feel.

Faster now Castiel sinks his tongue into his body. Endless thrusts joined by two spit slick fingers. There's no reprieve from the perfect assault on his body. Castiel is merciless in dishing out the pleasure on Sam. Deeper and a little harder the fingers curl into him until out of nowhere they nail down his prostate. The sensation of pure joy they're sending into his spine is as sharp as it is immediate.

"Fuck!" Sam can't not cry out at how good it feels. How it, unlike any other touch, melts his entire brain into nothing more than a mess driven towards arousal. "I need you… please. Need to feel you… inside of me." He's begging for the unknown. Castiel is his first, because he's never dared to let go with a man before. Not for the lack of wanting to, but more the fear of their reaction when they'd see the real him… his darker longings.

"Sam…"

"Do it. Finish me."

* * *

The mattress dips behind Sam. He can feel how Castiel crawls close, back between his spread and folded legs. Somehow, he couldn't move as he waited, eagerly… with nothing but want pulsing through his veins. Anticipation rushes into him. His breath of tension though leaves his lungs as fast as it came. More than anything he wants this. Needs for Castiel to close what little distance there is left between their bare bodies. His cock aches with arousal, but he doesn't want to touch himself. He's that entranced in the moment his angel has created.

"Sam." Tender hands grip around his hips. Sam tenses in his want. Longing shatters apart into sheer relief when at last Castiel slides into him, his cock swollen hard and perfectly slick with lube, or maybe massage oil. Sam can feel his arousal pulse as it brushes over his walls. The friction and stretch of it alone is enough to drive him further towards the edge of pleasure. At last! His body gives in with ease to what he's wanted for longer than he's been aware of himself.

Desperate not to come too fast Sam curls his fingers into the sheets. The fullness in his ass blows his mind, or rather what little there was left of it. He's too far gone to care about anything but the slow thrust into his prostate. "Oh", he whimpers at the sensation of completion. Where Castiel stills on him out of care Sam knows at once that he wants him to move, no… needs for him to make love and end all doubts on that this is where he belongs. "Do it", he repeats.

Slow and still far too gentle to his liking Castiel slips out of him only to thrust back into his body. "Faster… please, I won't break", Sam begs.

"I know." Care makes way for passion. Each snap of hips against his comes firmer, aimed bang to target too. Unfailing sparks of pleasure rip ever sharper into his body, because Castiel now milks his prostate without fail. Harder… deeper…

Sam arches into each thrust with greed. Nothing exists but the push and pull into his body. His neglected cock weeps pre-come, each drop gathering on the sheets below him to leave a wet spot. He's desperate to come, but he wants to delay the inevitable too. Of course, he can't. It's been too long for one… and with each fuck into his body he can feel himself slip further towards where he can't hang onto forever.

"So tight… so perfect." Castiel clings to his body even tighter, lost too in the heat of their joining. Sam is sure that his hips will wear the bruises of his passion… and he's proud to.

No longer able to think of words Sam slams back his hips in the tight hold. _"More"_ , he asks, and that is what he's given. Each pound drives deep into his being. He clenches and lets go around the maddening intrusion, desperate to feel as much of Castiel as he can. His orgasm hits him unexpected, like lightning on a clear day. He knows it's coming and yet it takes his breath away in how intense it rips from the depths of his body. Every last sensation wrecks through his body as he soils the sheets.

With the last of his strength he keeps pushing back. Sam feels how Castiel is still hard, sliding in and out of his body on nothing but arousal and love. He's sensitive and each slide against his prostate is almost too much, almost. What he wants though is to feel his angel let go. "Cas… use me, come for me." His voice is barely more than a hoarse sound of sleepy want.

Mercifully, Castiel is strong enough for them both. He keeps Sam up by the hips, slamming into his body again, urged on by his continued whimpers of, "Yeah… like that." The friction now is even more insane. Sam can feel how close Castiel is. His cock pulses deep into his heat… one more thrust… and another… until in one last hard shove Castiel too must let go. Sam trembles under the hot, wet seed filling him up while the cock inside of him begins to soften. He all but whimpers when in one last brush of sensations Castiel slips out of his body. Everything which held him up lets go… and he collapses, taking his angel down with him.

"Love you", he murmurs, uncensored, as he drifts off.

Sam never feels how Castiel rolls them both onto their sides. He's asleep, dreamless and sated, when his angel spoons up behind him with a smile of contentment on his face. No, Castiel doesn't sleep, and that is how even in his unconscious state Sam knows someone is watching over him while the last of his body and mind heals through the night.


End file.
